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- 7 Assumptions You May Encounter While Dating in Colombia
After some time dating in Colombia, you might eventually find a chick that you really like
Things become more serious and you two start a more formal relationship
Having been in a few serious relationships down here, there are some interesting details and stories that came along the way
I remember one Colombian girlfriend in particular for example
When she introduced me to her parents, her mom stared at me with wide open eyes like I was literally from another planet
Her eyes were on me the entire time no matter where I was in her house
Never blinked
Always as wide as possible
That lasted for maybe a month before she stopped staring at me like that
Which, funny enough, stopped a bit after I told my then girlfriend about how I founded it so weird that her mom just kept staring at me like it
Her dad was nice too – a very quiet guy
And her brother was also quiet and didn’t have much to say – he was a bit younger also
Overall, her family was nice to me
And my experience with them and other Colombian families has taught me a few things that you also might experience when meeting a girl’s family down here
So let’s break that down so you can have a better idea of what you may expect while dating in Colombia
First: Surprise
Depending on where your girl and her family are from, they may be genuinely surprised to see their daughter has a foreign boyfriend
In my experience, families from places like Bogota tend to be less surprised
In part perhaps because they meet foreigners more often in a place like Bogota and you are not as “exotic” or difference as you would be to Colombians in other parts of the country
For example, the girl mentioned in the story above was initially from a small village in Colombia before we met in Barranquilla
Not as many foreigners in Barranquilla and definitely not as many foreigners in small Colombian villages
So the less experience her family has with foreigners, the more “different” you will seem to them
Second: Spanish?
One assumption that her family and friends may have is that you must not speak any Spanish
I remember one girl I dated whose family was surprised when they learned that her and I only speak in Spanish
Even though I had been speaking Spanish to them in the last 10 minutes before that and they understood me fine
In another incident, I remember meeting a friend of the girlfriend mentioned earlier in this article
Some girl who was one of her best friends
And who assumed that I didn’t speak any Spanish
She tried speaking English in the first some odd minutes of us meeting each other but I didn’t understand her at all
It was mostly broken up English with a very heavy accent
And sometimes that happens
Where you are speaking Spanish with someone down here and they are insistent on their belief that you must not speak any Spanish so they try their best with English
Even if their English is terrible
Rarely will someone do that but it happens occasionally
And her friend ultimately switched to Spanish quickly enough because the flow of the conversation was a bit off
So in short – you will face this assumption regardless of how well your Spanish is.
And to be fair, there are plenty of foreigners who come to Colombia for the first time without Spanish. If your Spanish is a little bit rusty, try improving the basics of it with Duolingo
Or if you are willing to pay a little more, try getting a decent textbook I recommend or even a phrasebook for dating in Spanish
Third: Catholic?
As mentioned elsewhere on my website, a Colombian girl you are dating might insist that you say to her family that you are Catholic
Even if you are not
My advice is to be true and honest about what you are
Most likely they won’t have a problem with you or tell the daughter to not date you
Especially if she is already out of the house and working to support herself
And especially if she comes from a bigger city like Bogota
Just keep in mind that this issue may likely come up and you should think about how to address it
Fourth: Summer Fling
In some cases, you may encounter individuals or friends of hers to make assumptions about your relationship
For example, I remember one time that the girlfriend mentioned at the start of this article went to the beach with me
And there we met a Mexican chick who was a bit judgmental of our relationship and assumed it was just a “summer fling.”
Meaning that it was just for a few months and no way are we seriously dating
But we were seriously dating
The reality is that there are some individuals who believe that foreigners don’t stay too long in Latin America and just leave a few months later
They are kinda right in that it does happen
However, there are plenty of people who come down here and live long term with someone they meet here in Colombia or elsewhere in Latin America
And this will be an assumption you will face while dating in Colombia
Fifth: Jealously
With a Colombian girl that I dated some time ago, I met a lot of her friends when we were together
Most of them were pretty cool
However, one of them was a guy who was a bit jealous of the fact that I was with this chick
Where he basically was sending her messages that were indirect like just “hey” and other small messages also
Basically trying to get her attention and keep chatting with her
And occasionally trying to flirt but she always shot him down
It got to the point that they argued on Whatsapp when I was with her watching this unfold on her phone
And the guy accuses me of just “being a conquistador” who is only going to be in Colombia for a few months and then leave her
And how she “needs to date someone of her own country”
This is very similar to the assumption made by the Mexican chick above
However, the difference here is that the guy in question is not just saying something he believes to be true from his experience
Instead, he’s just jealous that he is single and I was with a chick he liked
And sometimes people are like that – where they are jealous and will say that “people need to date their own kind” to shame others to do just that
Because they hope that the shaming will somehow convince the person being shamed to “date their own kind” and perhaps date them specifically
Well, obviously she blocked him on Whatsapp and they never dated or anything
Just keep in mind that this type of thing is rare with Colombian dudes
Very few say this directly
But it can be happen while dating in Colombia
Sixth: Educated
While some of the assumptions made here are negative, some good ones exist too
For example, her family or friends might assume that you are well educated for being a foreigner from a developed country like the US
This is one of the “positive” assumptions made about foreigners in a way in that her family and friends are more likely to respect you more in this regard
Seventh: Good Income
This is another “positive” assumption in that her friends and family might also assume you likely have good income and can provide well.
Which, in a way, is kinda true
Keep in mind salaries are very low in Colombia
So making even $1,000 bucks a month here, which is low to Americans, is good money in Colombia
The only negative with this assumption is that sometimes one of her friends will assume you got endless money to spend and can cover others
Like paying for the entire taxi for a group trip or something else without them spending a fairer share on the cost of something
Which can be annoying when someone does that just because they assume you have lots of money to spend
But overall, this assumption is not entirely negative and will generally make people think more positively of you
Final Thoughts
Overall, I hope you found this article to be helpful in learning more about dating in Colombia. Leave any questions or insight below if you have any insight of your own on dating in Colombia and the assumptions you encounter about foreigners here.
Thanks and take care
Hasta luego parceros,
Seth
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